Monday, October 1, 2012

More Hooters Girl Facts of Life.


1.       You will have a boyfriend that is real or fake and you will know how to effortlessly talk about him in conversations to discourage creepers.

2.       You will get phone numbers, hotel room numbers, hotel keys, and my personal favorite house keys.

3.       You will have guys flirting with you like crazy and they will ask for your number and come bill time they don’t tip. I mean honestly if you are trying to impress me putting a big fat zero on the tip line is def not going to help your case buddy.

4.       Ever having a good looking guy sit in your section is super freaken rare, seriously. I thought working here it would be hot guy central but nope! And if hot guys do come in they aren’t crazy to get your number cuz they are hot and they know it so they don’t have to work as hard! Lame, but super true.

5.       You will become the queen of small talk. Its your job. There will be creepers that don’t speak at all that expect you to sit and talk with them, so small talk is your new best friend.

6.       You will deal with jealous girlfriends. You know who you are, you try to be the cool girlfriend that takes your boyfriend to Hooters cuz your oh so cool with yourself then you glare at every set of boobs that walks within ten feet of your man. And when a girl braves coming to take your orders you hang all over him in case we didn’t notice the neon sign that says ’TAKEN. THIS WHIPPED MAN IS TAKEN. SO BAC KTHE EFF OFF.’ Real subtle I know. Update to girls like this: we do NOT want your man. He may be a lovely person but you are so obviously uncomfortable here so why would we want the douche that takes you here knowing you would hate it? Come on.

7.       You will be obsessed with sports. Okay well maybe not, I was already obsessed with sports so I love this job even more cuz you can sit and talk sports an watch the games with customers.

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